Iron Stomach
by DarkHeart of Ice
Summary: More or less a one-shot, but with two chapters. What would happen if you have Akane and Naru on a cooking competition show? Stomach aches aplenty!


Howdy, yall! DarkHeart Is back! I have been ever so busy with work that I haven't even been able to work even on my Samurai's Heart story again. But fret not, I will get back to it eventually But I have told K and M about what or should say whom is gonna be in the next chapter. In any event, this is gonna be a one-shot. Just another idea that had been floating around my head while working on my other stories, also from reading some Ranma ½ fics. And I gotta tell ya, this one is gonna be funny.

Unknown Announcer: Ladies and Gentlemen, Live on this computer until it is posted on FF . Net, and or Media Miner, This is the "Iron Stomach Cooking show!" And now, The Co-Chairpersons of the show, DarkHeart of Ice and his love interest from his very first fic, Kanako!(applause and standing ovation)

Dark: Thank you! Thank You! Greetings everybody, and welcome to my new One-shot show! Even if it ends up in two chapters. (mutters "damn writer's block and normal job work.") gets elbowed by Kanako>

Kanako: Our show, Dark-Kun, our show.

Dark: smiles sheepishly Sorry, Kan-chan! Anyways, let's tell everyone at home what this show is all about, as well as giving out the disclaimer, OK?

Kanako: Sure, Dark-kun. The disclaimer is as follows:

Disclaimer: DarkHeart does not own the following anime series being used in this story, which includes Ranma ½, Love Hina, and Sailor Moon. They all belong to their respective senseis.

OK, now with that out of the way, Here at Iron stomach, we as co-chairpersons go all over the anime world, looking to find those that have had their cooking declared as either hazardous waste or other forms of weapons of mass destruction. We then select special judges to actually TASTE said food. They then decide which person should be granted a lifetime of training to a very good cooking school, and which person should be locked up by the FBI for creating something only terrorists have wet dreams about. Now, Back to you, Dark-Kun!

Dark: Thanks, Kan-chan. Now let's meet our Contestants! First, she is a student at the most prestigious college in all of Japan, and is co-landlord of an all girls dormitory with her husband. From the world of Love Hina, please give it up for Naru Narusegawa-Urashima!

(applause and wolf-whistles from Naru fanboys)

Naru: Thank you, Dark-san! It is such a pleasure to be a part of this show. She makes her way to her designated cooking area.

Dark: And now for her opponent. She is the heir to the Tendo family style of Anything Goes of Martial Arts, and is currently a student at Furinkan High School in the Nerima District. From the world of Ranma ½, give it up for Akane Tendo!

(massive applauding from the pervert brigade, especially Kuno)

Kuno: At last, the world shall know the beauty of the tigress that is Akane Tendo. Win this competition so that we can finally marry afterwards!

Kanako: OK, enough of that. Security!

_Just then the Sailor scouts appear in front of the audience._

Kanako: Oh, Good. You're here. Escort Mr. Kuno out of here, and if he tries to resist or even flirt with you in an unbecoming way, you have Dark-kun's and my authority to kill him. He has now been declared a threat to Crystal Tokyo, thanks to "Author's Power."

After hearing that last statement, everyone of the senshis smiled very maliciously as they aimed their attacks at one Tatewaki Kuno.

"Shabon Spray!" "Mars Flame Sniper!" "Jupiter Oak Evolution!" "Venus Love and Beauty SHock!" "Death Reborn Revolution!" "Space Sword Blaster!" "Deep Submerge!" "Deadly Scream!" "Starlight Honeymoon Therapy Kiss!"

The camera moves to where Kuno is...err, was, and sees a smoking crater with a shot of Kuno flying off into the distance.

Kuno: Curse you, Saotome, for ensnaring the beautiful warriors with your foul, sorcerous ways! Looks Like Team Rocket is blasting off again!

Everyone in the studio sweatdrops after hearing the delusional Kuno mixing up his usual banter with "Pokemon."

Dark: sighs What an idiot. Well, anyways, It is time to reveal today's special ingredient. Is everyone ready?

(applause)

Kanako: Okay, you asked for it! Today's special ingredient is: Hamburger! Competitors, take your positions! Are you ready?

Both Akane and Naru nod their heads, already planning what they can hopefully make that won't kill their fiance/husband.

Kanako: Alright! Let's get cooking! (buzzer sounds, signifying the start of the competition)

Announcer: This portion of the fanfic is brought to you today by Washu-chan's Lab. Where the term "Guinea Pig" takes on a whole new level. And by Ucchan's, Home of Martial Arts Japanese Pizza maker, Ukyo, and very cute fiance-in-making!

Dark: And on that note, it is time for our first station break. Please come back, won't you? I promise All Hell will break lose after these messages.

Like I said, this is absolute filler so I can get inspired to work on the next chapter Of "Samurai's Heart", but don't fret, faithful readers. I will get to work on it, just have some patience, unlike Akane. Till next time--

Thanx--DarkHeart P

DON'T GET ELIMINATED!


End file.
